12 Steps to Getting Over a Relationship

1. Buy/make yourself a new outfit/shoes that make you feel HOT.
2. Go dancing a lot. It gets out the pent up sexual energy, without the STD risk.
3. Quit/cut back on smoking and/or whatever alcohol or drugs you were abusing at the end of your relationship as a way of asserting your power over your ex-.
4. Do NOT lie around the house and mope. Force yourself to go out and fill your head with interesting and exciting experiences. (Take up a new hobby-there never was a better time to learn how to underwater basket weave or weld than RIGHT NOW!)
5. Learn/Start again doing something creative with your buddies, like start a band, or learn to knit.
6. Get a haircut. (Nothing says “Fuck you!” to the ex like them a hot new ‘do)
7. Change your mode of transportation. This enables you to change your patterns of rumination.
8. Set some professional goals. Improve your economic standards! Focus on work for a while!
9. Flirt with people of the type you don’t normally date. This enables you to get your flirting skills back up to date, feel attractive, and improve your self esteem in a risk-free way.
10. Generally dress in a way that makes you feel good. At the end of relationships, people tend to dress like slobs.
11. Buy a vibrator or self-love toy.
12. Start pursuing that dream that you put off.
13. Try to avoid bouncing into a new relationship. Rebounds are bad, you WILL make the same mistakes, until you learn the lessons.